I know this is supposed to be a blog about crafts. And, I know I haven't blogged for a while. We got the flu. I promise to blog about beaded socks and paper bag masks some time next week. But, I thought this would also be an awesome opportunity to write about my health battles too.
For the past two years my Lupus has been out of control! Previous to my pregnancies, I was in remission. I really didn't think about my Lupus very often. Now, I can't help but think about it. I have been so sick this past year. I have had pneumonia, the flu, countless infections. My joints are squishy and achy. My immune system in non-existent. And, I have no energy at all. Recently I learned that a special diet is helping some people control their symptoms, so I am planning to try using foods to help my health. Interestingly enough, it is a very restrictive diet. I need to eat between 9-12 servings of fruits and veggies per day. No tomatoes. Very little sugar. Very little fat. Like I said, this isn't the easiest diet to follow. But, I feel like I have to. I can't stand feeling like this anymore. And, while the diet is restrictive, I don't think that will be the hardest part. I will want to see the numbers on the scale change. Since I will be on Prednisone, that probably won't happen. The likelihood of losing weight while on steroids is slim to none. In fact, when I asked the doctor what he would do to lose weight while on steroids his reply was, "Wire your jaw shut." In other words, it isn't going to happen. It is tough for me to reconcile that I am going to look the same, and I have to get over it. It isn't about how I look. It is about how I feel. So, I am working on that.
This morning I ate one Omega-3 organic, free range egg and a piece of organic, non-cured, no additives turkey bacon, and a serving of fruit for breakfast. It wasn't bad. It wasn't great, but it wasn't bad. I just have to get used to the fact that my food won't be about eating. It will be like taking vitamins. Anyway, this is going to be my outlet because I know I am going to get frustrated. I know it won't be easy. I also know that if I don't do this then I am going to spend another year miserable and sick. I just can't do it. So between my "fun" new diet and getting up at 5:30 am three days a week for a boot camp class, I will probably be complaining a lot. But, I guess that is alright as long as I am doing the work.
It is a start to a new you. Once you get the eating under control and the lupus under control then you can work on the outside appearance. You are such a beautiful and caring person inside that honestly all I see when I see you is that inner beauty and the light of christ that shines thru you. Special diets are really tough even after you start feeling better. I have been trying to remain gluten-free for almost 4 years now and the first year I was in complete denial and ate things I wasn't supposed to just because it was so much easier then explaining to others. I didn't want to inconvience anyone with my special needs so I just spent a lot of time very sick and feeling like if I even breathed it was going to take more energy then I had. Then I found a great website and blog called Gluten-free girl and Gluten-free gobsmacked and I realized I could do this and my health was my responsibility. The web is a great resource of inspiration and knowledge. I still insist every now and then on having something I know I will regret but I definately think first am I willing to suffer for eating this is it going to bring me as much pleasure as the pain is going to be and the answer is normally no. I don't have tons of energy( I think that is a hormone imbalance thing since it seems to cycle) but I do have much better mental clarity,less joint pain, I don't break out in wierd blistery rashes everywhere, and I don't spend nearly as much time in the bathroom.I had no idea that one little gluten protien peptide could mess with your entire system. There are worse things then being forced to live the word of wisdom and treating your body like the temple that it is. You can do this and I am here to help any way I can. Now Bring on the cute crafts I know you have been creating.
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